I love to read Manuel's blog about being a waiter,
as I work in a similar position myself, namely as a barman.. I have always threatened to write a bit about it, so here are my top ten points, as to how you can be a better bar customer...
1. Don't wave, click your fingers, say excuse me etc. etc. Wait your turn and you'll be served.
2. Coffee is served in coffee shops, restaurants and Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.
3. Never approach a Barman with a food menu in your hand, as he is sure to find something else to do in the opposite direction.
4. If your pint is bad, tell me; If the Band are shit, tell them!
5. NO! We cant show the 'Big Brother'/'Britain's Got Talent' finals.
Tvs are for sports and News.
6. The Barman doesn't actually want to hear about your day, but he'll listen, for a limited time, don't outstay your welcome.
7.The barman doesn't give a flying-fiddlers-fuck how much 2 bottles of bud and 2 Bacardi Breezers cost on whatever flea-pit Spanish island from which you just returned.
8. If the Barman says you have enough, forget about it! Any amount of convincing about how you are grand, and that your only after coming out will be utterly futile. No Barman has ever gone back on a decision to refuse. Ever!
9. Don't ever tell a barman to cheer up, smile, look like he is enjoying himself! He will think you are an utter prick and ignore you later when it's busy and are trying to order your Corona with Lime.
10. The Barman knows that Corona comes with a slice of lime in the neck, and that pint bottles of Bulmers come with a pint of ice, so don't over-elaborate your order, we know, it's been ordered before.
If this list (just off the top of my head) makes me seem like an odious prick, then it has been more accurate than I thought. If it doesn't then I need to work on it. I may do a new list some other time after more thought.